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The Ice Pirates
1 review

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Movie Details

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Directed By
Stewart Raffill

Written By:
Stewart Raffill

Cast:
Robert Urich, Mary Crosby, Michael D. Roberts, John Matuszak, Anjelica Huston, Ron Perlman, John Carradine, Robert Symonds

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The Ice Pirates (1984)
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Movie Review by Zara
January 24th, 2007

I wanted him to be perfect!

Ever watch a movie over and over as a kid and then watch it again as an adult and wonder what the hell you thought was so great about it? That's exactly what THE ICE PIRATES is for me. One of those "What the hell was I so impressed by?" flicks. The movie is beyond cheesy, with lame dialogue, horrible special effects (if you can even call them that) and minimally passable acting. But you know what? I still enjoyed the damn thing. Just not for the reasons that I did as a kid.

THE ICE PIRATES can't make up its mind what it intends to be. There are very obvious scenes spoofing STAR WARS and ALIEN, and yet there are scenes where it appears to want to be taken seriously. As a kid, I think I latched on more to those, being especially entranced with the laughable bedroom scene between Urich and co-star Mary Crosby. As an adult I can appreciate the comedic element more, including the nuances, like the references to their escape ship having "space herpes." The various robots throughout the movie are especially amusing, since so many of them seem to have become the influence on many future sci-fi robotic characters.

The movie is in one word, bad. Yet there is that 80's element that is priceless, the last of a time when the "N" word could get used in a PG flick and not be considered offensive. THE ICE PIRATES will be mostly lost on those born in the years after the film's release, a major disservice done through the "magic" of CGI and Dolby Digital Surround Sound. But for those of us old farts who once sat spellbound through episodes of Battlestar Galatica, it's good for those wincing moments of laughter. Not at the movie, but at easily impressed, digitally arrested youth that we were.

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