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1 review

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Movie Details

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Directed By
Scott Wheeler

Written By:
Jonathan Haug

Ramon Camacho, Myles Cranford, Dustin Fitzsimons, Michael Gaglio, Tammy Klein, Amy Lindsay, Christine Nguyen, Diana Terranova, Curtis Pickett, Jack Cullison

MILF (2010)
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Movie Review by Mike Thomas
October 9th, 2010

Low-Brow, Yes - Funny as Hell, Hell, Yeah!

Favorite Movie Quote: "COUGH!"

It's no big secret that I enjoy physical comedy. And also the Hard-R comedy. So, when I got MILF, a new comedy from our guys at The ASYLUM, I was excited.

MILF, as everyone knows, stands for Mothers I'd Like to Know, in the Biblical Sense. The movie delivers, in spades:

Brandon (New Zealand actor Jack Cullison, in apparently his first feature film), his best bud, Anthony (Philip Marlatt), Nate (Joseph Booton) and Ross (Ramon Camacho) as the obligatory ethnic sidekicks, are freshmen at Generic State College (not it's real name), discover that , after bombing out at their own house party (though 'bombing out' in their case is of Hiroshima proportions), decide that they would have better luck 'shooting fish in a barrel,' i.e., prowling for sexually-starved older divorced, or otherwise unattached women. That was the easy part. Here's the fun part:

On a liquor run at Brandon's house, Anthony runs into Brandon's mom, Lori (Molinee Green, veteran of late-night cable adult programming ), who makes uncomfortable advances on Anthony, who has already professed his lust for Lori to Brandon, finally culminating in the ultimate nipple slip (full frontal nudity five minutes into the movie).

Meanwhile, Brandon, stopping over Anthony's house on an errand with Anthony, runs into Anthony's mom, Holly (Amy Lindsay, also late of cable adult entertainment), and they end up in an accidental (yeah, right) kiss.

Got all that?

So now the stage is set. Each friend desperately trying to hide their trysts with the other's mom. To break the tension, British Nate and Indian Ross ( guess, not too sure), go about their sexual conquests, each betting they will end up with the most MILF by the end of the school year. So the sexual adventures begin: Nate getting into a menage a trois (unknowingly and unwillingly) with a yoga instructor, also with the wife of his physics teacher (Myles Cranford), and Ross being turned into a chocolate sundae with a compulsive nympho (Diana Terranova). There is a plot complication with this situation that they resolve, in a too-easily time-restraint solution.

As with this type of movie, all is found out, then resolved in a nice, neat bow, as do all these "best friends banging each other's moms" scenarios go (as seen in the Rob Lowe comedy CLASS).

Roll Credits.

It's very easy to do an AMERICAN PIE/LOSIN' IT/HARD BODIES rip-off. That's fine. Writers re-invent the wheel in Hollywood on an hourly basis. The trick is, imitation though it may be, making it funny is the trick. And amongst the bounty of boobies and simulated sex, there were falling-off-the-chair funny moments in each painfully awkward scenario, and a few surprises from the characters. It was low-brow comedy, for sure, but I was relieved by the absence of bodily function gags (okay, there was one, but it was unexpected and hilarious), and the eye-candy was worthy of any late-night cable adult programming, only the action would be too good and the dialogue would be deliberately too funny. I did have some issue with the contrived love story (if you could call it that) between Brandon, and another coed (Jamie Bernadette), in that came in and out of the story line with no rhyme or reason. Otherwise, all the pieces fit into a very funny storyline, that although anyone who has seen two of this type of movie could figure out the ending, the journey was what made the movie entertaining.

On my new rating scale of with 5 being drop everything and see the movie now; if you're female, bear the producers' children and 0 being burn down the theater, murder the movie staff, and violate their dog, this movie rates a solid 4. It's late-night cable entertainment at best. It's funny, sophomoric humor, and you'd have to go into this movie with that mindset. See it with your best buds and marvel how they packed so much boobage in one movie.

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Oct 10, 2010 6:14 PM
I'm not trying to be dumb here, but how does MILF translate into "Mothers I'd Like To Know" in the Biblical sense?

I could see MILF, maybe, standing for "Mother, I Like To Fukk" - 'Cause judging by this film's poster and what you say I get the impression that that's what this film is, sort of, all about. Isn't it?
Mike Thomas
Oct 10, 2010 6:42 PM
C'mon, Billybob!

If you know me, you should know I don't like to use obscenities, even when it calls for it. So my joke is to use a euphemism that everyone knows exactly what I mean, and let the reader fill in the blanks, obscenities and all.

Keeps the readers thinking.

And, yes, the movie is ALL about MILF (in the movie, it says the plural of MILF is MILF, since the plural is "Mothers I'd Like to," similar to "Mother-in-Law," or the plural of sheep is sheep.)

The movie is not "sort of - " it's balls-to-the-wall MILF-ism.

But it is damned funny. If you like that kind of movie, it's a must-see.
Oct 10, 2010 7:21 PM
Ok-OK, Mike.

I admit it - Even after your N-Word column, I didn't realize that the use of obscenities wasn't your thing. I mean, that's fine not to use profanity, and such. But, hey, remember, "I don't know you", so there was no way I could have known that this was the case.

But, on the other hand, (for you) when it comes to the use of obscenities, you're saying you're not bothered by seeing a film that's literally "chock-fukking-full" of them?
Mike Thomas
Oct 10, 2010 7:35 PM
It doesn't upset me when people use obscenities (okay, it bothered me about the prolific use of obscenities in SUPERBAD. It does upset me when obscenities are used outside one's social circle, i.e., in public).

But I choose not to use it when I write. It's just the way I choose to write.

Let me share a story....

In my youth, my family didn't curse in public, or around us children. One day, i made the mistake of saying, "Damn" in front of my 81-year-old grandfather. Before I knew what was happening, I was knocked across the room! That was the very last time I cursed in front of my family, and to this day, I seldom curse at all.

Also, I worked with kids in Catholic Theatre for 36 years. I've just trained myself not to curse.

On the contrary, I'm not intolerant of how others choose to speak. From South Philly Slang to Ebonics to Street Talk - it's just the way people are.

"Live and let live."
Oct 10, 2010 8:48 PM

Your 81-year-old grandpa knocked you across the room for saying "Damn"!? Who knows what would have happened had you used the F-word. I don't think you'd be alive right now to tell the tale.

I get really irritated when half of the dialogue in a film seems to center around the (over)-use of the f-word. If anything else, it shows a real lack of imagination.
Mike Thomas
Oct 10, 2010 9:17 PM
You're right.

If out of the hundreds of thousands of words in the English Language, if you can't get past the Seven Words You Can't Use on Television, then maybe it's time to look for another line of work besides writing!

Oct 19, 2010 12:51 PM
I think MILK is another movie!
Mike Thomas
Oct 19, 2010 2:46 PM
[comment deleted by Mike Thomas]
Mike Thomas
Oct 19, 2010 9:38 PM
I think I came in the middle of this movie....

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