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All Movie Info
Starring:
Josh Pais, Trent Moore, Lenny Von Dohlen, Ashley Springer, Leslie Dawn Forsyth, John Hensley, Jess Weixler, Jess Weixler, Hale Appleman, Paul Galvan, Julia Garro, Kristen Gabrielle Green, Ava Ryen Plumb, Amber M. Rogers, Angela J. Rogers, David E. Rogers, Jessica A. Rogers, Timothy L. Rogers, Taylor Sheppard, Nicole Swahn, Hunter Ulvog, Adam Wagner, Kiri Weatherby, Vivienne Benesch
Directed By:
Mitchell Lichtenstein
Written By:
Mitchell Lichtenstein
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Teeth (2008)
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Movie Review by Jarrod 
May 13th, 2008
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'Teeth' may set a record for the number of severed penises shown in a film. There are three altogether, one of which is eaten by a Rottweiler, while its former owner watches with helpless disgust. The film has a positively brilliant and delightfully gruesome premise, based around the myth of vagina dentata, which, translated crudely from the Latin, means "pu**y teeth". Only it is a not myth in the case of Dawn (Jess Weixler), a high school student who preaches the virtues of abstinence, and vows to maintain her chastity until her wedding night. No sooner has she given a speech on this topic then she is hypocritically lusting after and fantasizing about one of her classmates, Tobey (Hale Appleman). He and Dawn both have a bizarre aversion to sex; though hers is initially stronger than his, and his seems to be derived from a religious upbringing, most likely Catholic, since Catholic doctrine attempts to distort and suppress human sexual impulses, discouraging non-procreative forms of intercourse, even frowning upon masturbation, which the Vatican used to claim made one go blind, and exhausted a finite reserve of semen, which was apparently stored and manufactured somewhere other than the testicles. That digression aside, 'Teeth' also explores the Freudian concept of castration anxiety, a literal fear of having one's penis cut off, and introduces boys to the mysteries of feminine sexuality, which they may find confounding and intimidating; Freud is deservedly criticized for his view that women essentially spend their lives in a state of penis envy, wishing they had a penis, and that boys, upon seeing or becoming aware of female genitalia, assume that the vagina was actually once a penis, which has since been chopped off, usually as punishment for something.
Dawn's dentata are not visible at first glance apparently; and she doesn't even know they exist, until she has invited Tobey to swim with her at a secluded lagoon, where they end up in a cave behind a waterfall, a popular site for copulation among other local kids. Tobey, who seems like such a nice and respectful guy, tries to rape Dawn, and loses his dick in the process. Dawn is as horrified by this as he is. She researches vagina dentata on the Internet, and takes a trip to the gynecologist, who does what I found to be an unusually intrusive examination of her vagina, and has four of his fingers bitten off. Her mother's illness worsens, and she has to deal with an awful white trash pervert of a stepbrother, named Brad (John Hensley). Brad had an experience with Dawn when they were children; he does not quite remember what is responsible for biting the end of his index finger; but the experience has made him avoid vaginal penetration during sex, he prefers instead to screw his girlfriend Melanie right up the ass. Brad wants to deflower Dawn, for reasons that are perhaps best left unknown. He does not get along well with his father, Bill (Lenny von Dohlen), and is resentful of his stepmom Kim (Vivienne Benesch).
Dawn never sees Tobey again, and end up seeking comfort with Ryan (Ashley Springer), another classmate, who, like every other male she encounters, wants to get in her pants. He has made a bet with one of his buddies that he can take Dawn's virginity; and he does; it backfires on him, though when she finds out. Dawn may or may not be able to control her dentata completely; they are a remarkable and fierce defense mechanism, to ward off any potential rapists or sexual assaulters. Dawn does seem able to exert some control over them, and they do not react at all if she willingly has sex with someone. If scared or under emotional duress, they chomp down on anything that happens to be there. Writer-director Mitchell Lichtenstein does not spare us the sight of the severed penises, which I think I made clear; they made me squirm, and not since Caligula have I seen a penis devoured by a dog; that is an image I thought I would never have to revisit again. Imagine the pain, if you will, Tobey apparently bleeds to death; Ryan ends up in an operating room hoping to get his re-attached, the surgeon about to perform the procedure has a priceless line I won't spoil for potential viewers.
Jess Weixler is terrific, Dawn is a smart and sympathetic girl, convincingly troubled by the monstrous mutation between her legs, but then she learns how to make practical use of it; I was disturbed by the final scene, where she has been picked up alongside the road by a gross old man who is obviously suggesting that she repay him for the ride with a little you-know-what. I think everyone knows how that would end. The movie is a unique and disturbing horror film with a dark sense of humor, and a self-conscious understanding of its own inherent absurdity. Dawn is not exactly the monster here; more like the victim, surrounded by male predators. However, she can assume the role of predator when necessary; watch how she decides to exact revenge on Brad. I cannot anticipate the feminist reaction to this movie, but I enjoyed its not-so-subtle message about how women, in this case, get a chance to protect themselves from sexual violence, and to regulate their own sexuality, without masculine tyranny.
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 | Zara
May 13, 2008 10:01 PM
also wrote a review of Teeth 
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The doctor's visit we talked about a lot, since I know what it's like to actually be in one. I liken the scene somewhat to the molestation of clientèle in THE HAND THAT ROCKED THE CRADLE. Firstly, a doctor (even a female one) would not be left alone with a patient when doing the exam. A nurse is supposed to be present at all times to avoid having allegations leveled at them that might be false. Secondly, when he takes his glove off, that's illegal right there, not to mention the forcefulness of using four fingers on a patient who has clearly explained that she's uncertain of her sexual involvement.
Long story short, he definitely deserved to get those fingers bitten off. |
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