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DON'T PANIC! YOU'RE ON THE TITANIC! Tsk. Tsk. Shame-Shame on director, James Cameron. Cameron claims that TITANIC was written by him. Oh, Yeah!? This is just not true. In fact, it's pure bulls.h.i.t. All Cameron did was add a few of his own special touches to a screenplay that was, pretty much, written back in 1958. I guess he was hoping that nobody would notice this, especially if he totally dazzled us with a 'tacked on' spectacular view of the TITANIC's actual sinking. Well, sorry Cameron, but some of us did notice. We don't all walk around in our sleep, you know. What I'm lipping-off about here is in reference to the 1958 movie called 'A NIGHT TO REMEMBER' (or, ANTR for short) Cameron simply gave us the cutie-pie, 'Romeo and Juliet' version of this very same movie. The lifting of scenes straight out of ANTR and putting them into his now-floating/now-sinking White Elephant is downright criminal. It is. You really have to see it to believe it. And I'm not just talking about ripping-off major scenes here. Cameron got right down to the nitty-gritty of scene stealing. I'll give you 3 examples of Cameron's outright movie-plagiarism. 1 - The contrast made between the rich and the poor on this ship. As in ANTR, Cameron presented a real distinction between these 2 classes of people. At one point he focused on the peasants having their slap-happy hoedown, and then he gave us a sample of the wealthy doing their snooty, little minuet. 2 - Like in ANTR, Cameron had musicians positioned on the deck playing instruments while the TITANIC was sinking away. In both films the music that was being played was classical and the tempo was definitely on the up side. I personally found this added touch to the sinking of the ship as truly bizarre. It seemed absolutely preposterous to me, that while the Titanic were sinking the musicians were trying to create a 'festive' mood for the panicking passengers. A weird way to handle disaster. Like, who put them up to this? It was as though these musicians were saying, 'C'mon everybody! We know the ship's sinking, but, hey, pick up your heels and do a polka, anyways!'.... Get real! 3 - This is again in both films during the sinking....While everyone else is out on the main deck, trying to get a seat in one of the life-boats, the Titanic's Architect/Designer is standing in front of the mantle in the massive dining area, looking up at the clock. At this point he first takes a gander at his own wrist-watch then he leans forward, opens the glass face of the mantle-clock and adjusts the time, which happens to be off by, maybe, one minute, or two. This scene is, literally, identical in both movies. There are certainly many other scenes that Cameron has, literally, lifted from ANTR. At times the only difference between these two movies is the actors and the fact that ANTR was filmed in Black and White. Actually ANTR is a more accurate account of the sinking. TITANIC is off the mark by a nautical mile. I mean, it wasn't just because of the fog that this ocean-liner struck an iceberg and sank. There was a lot of behind the scenes stuff. It, pretty much, added up to pure human stupidity that went along with this iceberg collision and the failure to send a rescue-party. ANTR makes this human stupidity all too clear. After viewing both these films it got me to thinking about the 'real' sinking of the Titanic. Personally, I can not accept that so many people perished in this disaster. The only reason why so many passengers and crew died that night was because there wasn't one, single 'thinking' person anywhere on this ship. It' true. If there had been then the drownings would have been kept down to a reasonable minimum of, maybe, 100, or at the most 200. I'm not kidding. And the whole answer to everyone's survival on the Titanic depended on 'Doors'. Here's how I see it............The Titanic was a monster of an ocean-liner. No expense was spared when it came to making it the most beautifully impressive ship ever built. Naturally, only the best materials were used in its construction, including hundreds-of-thousands of solid-wood doors. If there had been even one real 'thinking' person on this ship during its sinking then he/she would've realized that removing all the doors and using them as floating boards could've saved, pretty well, everyone on board, except for, maybe, a few idiots. From the time that the Titanic hit the iceberg, to the time that it completely sank into the ocean depths took about 2 hours. If someone with some real insight had gathered together a sizable team of helpers with axes and other tools to remove as many of these solid-wood doors as possible, then the Titanic would never have been remembered as the worst ocean-liner disaster in history. Yes, I do realize that what I'm suggesting would've been a huge undertaking, but it isn't unrealistic. And it sure makes a lot of sense. I mean, the ships sinking. It's not like anyone's really got anything else to do, except to wait around to drown. And I'm sure they don't want to do that, so, in the meantime, get an enthusiastic team together, grab some axes (there must be plenty at the dozens of fire-stations), and take down some doors, or wall-panelling, or whatever. But, hey, we will survive. It was obvious that this idea of using the doors as mini-rafts didn't dawn on anyone and, so, they all waited around like fools to freeze to death in the sub-zero Atlantic Ocean. Shame on you all.........And, yes, shame on James Cameron, too. email this review to a friend
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Jul 31, 2008 9:43 PM
As far as removing doors, there would be axes everywhere, just like fire-extinguishers, at all fire-stations, on every level of this ship. Got any comments on that?
Aug 7, 2008 11:49 AM
Aug 17, 2008 8:04 PM
After checking out your dreary, little profile with your sucky reviews of Mary Poppins and friggin' Debbbie Reynolds, I don't think you are in any position to be criticizing, or finding fault, or 'correcting' anything that I've written. What I wrote about the Titanic was thought from my own head and not taken from any website, which none-thinkers like youself get your info from. What I wrote may not have been accurate, but it was certainly 100% more interesting than your s.h.i.t.t.y Nashville review.
Go F.U.C.K yourself!! Or maybe you should f.u.c.k Matthew. Don't bother me any more! OK!!!?? And the next time you fake a profile, at least make it look a little more authentic, you dizzy B.I.T.C.H!!
Sep 1, 2008 2:47 AM