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Dragonheart
1 review

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Movie Details

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Directed By
Rob Cohen

Written By:
Charles Edward Pogue

Cast:
Dennis Quaid, David Thewlis, Pete Postlethwaite, Dina Meyer, Julie Christie, Jason Isaacs, Brian Thompson, Wolf Christian, Terry O'Neill


 
Dragonheart (1996)
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Movie Review by BillyBob
April 25th, 2014

In 984 A.D. Dragons Were A Dime A Dozen

Half-expecting Draco, the dragon, to suddenly get up and start singing & dancing (these were the last 2 humiliations that hadn't yet been imposed upon him in Dragonheart), I can't begin to tell you how pathetically bad this Fantasy/Adventure movie turned out to be.

Dragonheart was the sort of movie that's sure to make you hate dragons. 'Cause if Draco really was supposed to be a typical dragon of medieval times, then, believe me, extinction was the only reasonable answer for dealing with such a supremely annoying creature as this.

Had the scriptwriters of Dragonheart just left well-enough alone (but they never can) and simply allowed Draco to be just a garden-variety dragon (sans the "personality-plus" factor), then, yes, I honestly think that this poorly-conceived picture might have faired so much better, in the long run.

But, no, these narrow-visioned screenwriters had to go and make big, old Draco a beast who could be reasoned with, had serious emotional hang-ups, could speak fluent English, and, on top of all of that, they had him play the dupe in one of Bowen's shifty, under-handed, little schemes to fleece the gullible peasants out their hard-earned money (otherwise he'd order Draco to promptly trample all over their homes).

This ruthless manipulating of Draco by Bowen was a perfect example of how this particular character operated. And it closely tied in with another aspect of Dragonheart's disappointing story that totally grated on my nerves and further convinced me to slap this film with such a low rating.

Dennis Quaid played the Bowen character. And to say that Quaid was a royal pain in the neck would be an understatement of the highest order. This Bowen-bozo never stopped complaining about how no one, these days, was following "The Old Code". This was apparently a strict code of conduct which dealt with a man's adherence and devotion to such things as honor, valor, courage and truth.

And, of course, Bowen, with his starry-eyed allusions, blindly believed himself to be one of the very few gallant and noble men around who still lived by this rigid code of ethics. But the truth about Bowen (a real untrustworthy scoundrel) was that he would've gladly sold his own grandmother's gold-fillings from her teeth just for the sake of making a quick buck.

All-in-all - I found this whole phony "One-For-All-And-All-For-Me" mentality that prevailed throughout Dragonheart's hypocritical, little story to be very, very tiresome, indeed. This frickin' pretentious "Old Code" business played hand-in-hand with some absolutely awful attempts at humor, as well as some pretty tedious and painfully predictable battle scenes, thrown in for good measure.

As far as I'm concerned, Dragonheart was nothing but a badly-conceived movie meant only for tiny tots who don't give the slightest damn about good quality story-telling.

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