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Beautiful Casting There's something in here for everyone in this flick, from the boys to the girls. A story about a guy who goes back to the small town where he grew up for a high school reunion to be reunited with the friends he had who never left, BEAUTIFUL GIRLS gets the angles of the women's perspectives just as well as the men's even though the men are the central focus. One of the friends is obsessed with supermodels to the point that he alienates his own girlfriend. Then, once confronted with the fact that she's broken up with him isn't sure how to approach his life anymore. One of the friends is the good old boy type who claims to love his girlfriend but is stepping out on her with a married woman. But my favorite characters in this flick are a young Natalie Portman, fresh off her stunning turn in LEON (also known as THE PROFESSIONAL), as the neighbor girl who lives next to the returning son's former home. Wise beyond her years and a delicious piece of intelligent jail bait, she makes you understand why some men utter the ridiculous statement of "age isn't nothing but a number!" The other character I enjoy is played by Rosie O'Donnell, back in a time when people still liked her and weren't so thrown off by her now current abrasive attitude. She delivers the best speech in the entire film, one that should be taught to every young boy as they're growing up: "I'm finished speaking to both of you okay? You're both f*cking insane. You want to know what your problem is? MTV, Playboy, and Madison f*cking Avenue. Yes. Let me explain something to you, ok? Girls with big t*ts have big asses. Girls with little t*ts have little asses. That's the way it goes. God doesn't f*ck around; he's a fair guy. He gave the fatties big, beautiful t*ts and the skinnies little tiny niddlers. It's not my rule. If you don't like it, call him. Hey Mitch. Thank you. [Looking at a porn magazine] Oh, guys, look what we have here. Look at this, your favorite. Oh, you like that? Yeah, that's nice right? Well, it doesn't exist ok. Look at the hair. The hair is long, it's flowing, it's like a river. Well, it's a f*cking weave ok? And the t*ts, please! I could hang my overcoat on them. t*ts by design were invented to be suckled by babies. Yes, they're purely functional. These are silicon city. And look, my favorite, the shaved pubis. Pubic hair being too unruly and all. Very key. This is a mockery, this is a sham, this is bullsh*t. Implants, collagen, plastic, capped teeth, the fat sucked out, the hair extended, the nose fixed, the bush shaved... These are not real women, all right? They're beauty freaks. And they make all us normal women with our wrinkles, our puckered boobs, hi bob, and our cellulite feel somehow inadequate. Well I don't buy it, all right? But you f*cking mooks, if you think that if there's a chance in hell that you'll end up with one of these women, you don't give us real women anything approaching a commitment. It's pathetic. I don't know what you think you're going to do. You're going to end up eighty-years old, drooling in some nursing home, then you're going to decide, it's time to settle down, get married, have kids? What, are you going to find a cheerleader? Charge it Mitch. Look at Paul. With his models on the wall, his dog named Elle McPherson. He's insane. He's obsessed. You're all obsessed. If you had an once of self-esteem, of self-worth, of self-confidence, you would realize that as trite as it may sound, beauty is truly skin-deep. And you know what, if you ever did hook one of those girls, I guarantee you'd be sick of her. No mater how perfect the nipple, how supple the thigh, unless there is some other sh*t going on in the relationship, besides the physical, it's going to get old, ok? And you guys, as a gender, have got to get a grip. Otherwise, the future of the human race is in jeopardy." (There's some interruptions in there, but I wanted to get the whole thing in.) One of the best movies ever made about the differences between men and women and the sacrifices we're willing to make when we love one or the other. email this review to a friend
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