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2 reviews / review this flick

Don't Go Near the Park 1981

As punishment for cannibalizing their tribe's children, two members of an ancient Neanderthal clan (Crackers Phinn and Barbara Monker) are cursed with aging for eternity -- but never dying. And in their bid to recapture their stolen youth, the voracious pair now preys on the tasty human morsels that visit the local park. Aldo Ray and scream queen Linnea Quigley star in this classic horror schlocker directed by Lawrence D. Foldes. (read more)

Directed By:
No image existsLawrence D. Foldes
Written By:
No image existsLawrence D. Foldes
No image existsLinwood Chase
No image existsAldo Ray
No image existsMeeno Peluce
No image existsTamara Taylor
Linnea QuigleyLinnea Quigley
No image existsDavid Ariniello
No image existsSteven Lovy
No image existsBarbara Monker
No image existsCrackers Phinn
No image existsChris Riley

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Don't Go Near the Park Movie Review by Movie Addict (10/10/2008)

One of the infamous video nasties that were banned in Britain and released uncut two years ago.

This was a strange film that took place over 12.000 years as Gar (Crackers Phinn) and Tra (Barbara Monker) we cursed until the wolves surround the moon again which 12 millenia. They then need to have a child and sacrifice her...

(complete Don't Go Near the Park review by Movie Addict)

Don't Go Near the Park Movie Review by Zombie Boy (10/31/2007)

Yeah, um, don't go near this movie is more like it.

12,000 years ago, some people who look just like modern homo-sapiens did something that made their mom mad, and got some incomprehensible curse put on them. Now they have to eat young people to stay young, until they can fulfill some stupid-ass prophecy. I don't know....

(complete Don't Go Near the Park review by Zombie Boy)

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