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The Biggest Hypocrite in Hollywood
by Tim Josephs

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So, in case you didn't know, TITANIC is being re-released in theaters starting April 4. You remember TITANIC, the grossly overrated film that was made for about the cost of Canada that centers around a lame love story, a selfish lying old hag, and a lot of dead bodies? Well, you may be wondering why it's going back into theaters. Is it some kind of special anniversary? It has been 15 years, but generally that isn't a terribly big milestone. (THE MATRIX also came out in '97 and as far as I know they're not putting that back into theaters.) No, TITANIC is back for one
reason: to be whored out for 3D. You see, James Cameron decided the nearly $2 billion the movie has made isn't enough so he converted the film into 3D in hopes of making another billion or so.

Now, it's common knowledge how big of an egomaniac Cameron is. Calling his film the "most beloved of all time" is proof of that. He also seems to believe that he and only he should be using 3D because he's the only one who can do it properly. Here's what he said about CLASH OF THE TITANS: "Now, you've got people quickly converting movies from 2D to 3D, which is not what we
did. They're expecting the same result, when in fact they will probably work against the adoption of 3D because they'll be putting out an inferior product."

Here's what he said in regards to PIRANHA: "I tend almost never to throw other films under the bus, but [it] is exactly an example of what we should not be doing in 3D. Because it just cheapens the medium and reminds you of the bad 3D horror films from the 70s and 80s, like FRIDAY THE 13TH: 3D."

But the fact that Cameron has now turned TITANIC into 3D just proves how much of a hypocrite he really is.

"It doesn't make any sense to shoot in 2D and convert to 3D."

Who do you think said that? If you guessed James Cameron, then you get a prize. So, James, I guess you were just referring to everyone one else's movies, right?

And finally, here's another quote from Cameron that really sums it all up nicely.

"When movies got to the bottom of the barrel of their creativity and at the last gasp of their financial lifespan, they did a 3D version to get the last few drops of blood out of the turnip."

I couldn't have said it better myself. Bravo, Mr. Cameron!

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Mike Thomas
Mar 27, 2012 12:17 AM
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Don't get me started. Originally a horror writer (he was FIRED from PIRANHA 2), he thumbs his nose at the genre now, thumbs his nose at 2D now ("I'm only going to make 3D movies from now on"), and NONE of his movies have ever gotten Oscars for acting.

If it weren't for his Ah-Nuld movies, he'd still be writing horror!

Good column. Thanks for letting me vent.

Apr 13, 2012 2:23 AM
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Even though the column's a few weeks old, I have to say: I was not one of the people that thought Avatar was that special. I mean, the raindrops looked really cool, and that's about it. Personally, I think he's way off, because a lot of people - I included - enjoy the type of 3D he's trashing, as well as the movies that use them, more than whatever he's trying to do.

Plus he talks about 3D like it's some kind of fresh new artform that needs to be cultivated, as if he's the end-all be-all of the format. But 3D has been around since the 50s! It's not something James Cameron discovered and is going to cause to flourish.

Finally, for me, James Cameron was his first two movies: The Terminator and Aliens. That's my two cents.

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Movie Musings
Every other Tuesday

Thoughts, observations, conjectures, complaints about movies and mostly how they relate to me personally. If you're looking for something a little broader, try Ebert.

Other Columns
Other columns by Tim Josephs:

So Long 2013, and MatchFlickers!

The Season for Peace, Presents, & Puncture Wounds

Women are Once Again Kicking Ass

Chewing the Scenery

The Greatest President We Never Had

All Columns

Tim Josephs
Born to write (literally much to the displeasure of his mother, he emerged with a pencil clutched in one tiny fist), Tim spends most of his days crafting epic monosyllabic poems, new comical titles to his favorite Beatles' songs (Hey, Dude), and angry letters to local businesses that have wronged him in some way. He's really an okay guy once you get to know him.

If you have a comment, question, or suggestion, you can send a message to Tim Josephs by clicking here.

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