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They'd Never Do The in a Million Years.
by The Alpha Craig

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Whooooaaa, somebody's coming.

Whooooaaa, somebody's coming.
Well at least not right away. What am I talking about? Well let's think about some of the best story arcs from the comic world and then filter out those you know would never get made into a movie. I have compiled a list of four that I like that would never make it to the big screen. The two I can think of are so I am only doing them today. So without further ado, I give you the two.

The Death of Superman
Well with the reboot in mind you know it is way too soon, if at all, for a story of this magnitude. It is so epic that I will summarize it in my words as best I can. It all starts off with a gloved fist is shown punching a steel wall on the last page of several titles with the ominous caption "Doomsday is coming!" Basically this fist belonged to an experiment. About 250,000 years ago, before humanoid life were the
A touching scene, too bad he comes back.... spoiler alert.

A touching scene, too bad he comes back.... spoiler alert.
dominant species on Krypton a being lived. The climate was the harshest possible conditions so it made this being the strongest living thing. In much more modern times, a sadistic alien scientist Bertron created a humanoid infant form of this being and proceeded to put it in the harshest conditions possible, hence killing it. Bertron sought the perfect life form so he cloned a new infant from the DNA of the dead infant, altering it to adapt to its death while retaining its memories. This happened several thousand times and the end result was Doomsday. After taking on most of the universe and finally being killed by the entire force of OA and The Radient, his body was sealed in a metal casket and shot into space where he impacted and was driven deep beneath the surface of the Earth.
This was considered high-tech in the day, still impressive to me.

This was considered high-tech in the day, still impressive to me.
After thousands of years of regeneration, Doomsday returned to life and fought his way to the surface. He battled Superman to their mutual deaths. I don't see this happening because it would open pandora's box in trying to explain Erdicator, Superboy, Superman Cyborg, and Steel. It would be epic none-the-less.

Batman: Digital Justice
This would be way cool, but now that we have taken Batman back to his roots there is a lot that would need to be introduced before taking this leap. Here we a quick-and-dirty explanation. It is the near distant future and society relies heavily on technology, specifically computers. Batman has died and we are following James Gordon, the grandson of Commissioner Gordon who is a detactive on the Gotham Police Force. A sentient
Virtual Batman and Joker = awesome!

Virtual Batman and Joker = awesome!
computer virus called The Joker begins to wreak havoc on the world and Gordon is tasked with finding a way to defeat it. In the process he finds a letter to his grandfather from Bruce Wayne confessing his identity as Batman as well as granting him access to the Batcave and all of his wonderful toys. Detective Gordon finds the cave and takes up the mantle of Batman with aid from a computerized version of Alfred Pennyworth and a street-punk informant who becomes the new Robin This would demand a lot of the introductions of characters like Robin to be speed up and probably done incorrectly and acknowledge Batman's inevitable death so I doubt this will happen.

Well I am spent for today so I hope everyone got their fill. Thanks again for reading true believers, EXCELSIOR!

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Bringing you a vast wealth of comic book movie knowledge from a 4,000 plus book collection and experience at Rain City Comics.


Other Columns
Other columns by The Alpha Craig:

The Enemy of My Enemy Is My Friend

When I'm Good, I 'm Bad.......

Hey Bub, I'm Not Through With You

With Friends Like These....

She Works For Fudge!

All Columns


The Alpha Craig
I am the first and the last, maybe not. I'm 31 years old and still spend my disposable income on comic books. Might as well put it to good use.


Contact
If you have a comment, question, or suggestion, you can send a message to The Alpha Craig by clicking here.


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