A real crystal skull. |
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**WARNING: INDIANA JONES SPOILERS.**
Despite KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL, the world still needs Indy.
It's hard to put words to what exactly went wrong with the latest installment of the Indiana Jones quadrilogy. After my inane excitement leading up to the release date, I was naturally bombarded with inquiries about the quality of the film after I had seen it. Originally, I gave the non-committal answer of "satisfying." By the next day my response had evolved to "good."
As the hours went on I realized how unsatisfied I truly was with the movie and since I walked out of the theater Thursday night I have been trying to sort out why.
The film had all of the key elements that captured us in the first three films. Dusty, mysterious tomb? Check. Decrepit skeletons? Check. Creepy crawly pests? Check. Indy's fear of snakes? Check. The hunt for treasure? You betcha. Harrison Ford as Henry Jones Jr.? Wouldn't have gone without him.
So why is this newest adventure sub-standard?
One of the biggest disappointments for me was that once again a Lucas franchise has been compromised of its "old-fashioned tricks" for overwhelming CGI. The tales of the original trilogy became alive, thanks to the help of the filmmakers' use of real props. The tarantulas, the snakes, the bugs, the rats? All very real. The signature boulder that Indy runs away from at the beginning of RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK was full-sized and fiber glass. The suspension bridge built across the gorge in India during Indy's adventures in TEMPLE OF DOOM? Also very real. Even the sequins on Kate Capshaw's character's dress in the same movie were authentically early twentieth century—anything but phony.
However, nothing at all was palpable in KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL. Indy's trademark exciting encounter with creepy crawly pests was traded in for cold, computer-animated ants. Ridiculously cute moments involving curious gophers and an even more unlikely scene with monkeys spoiled any realism that this movie might have 
The man's gaze speaks for itself... |
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salvaged.
So why spoil the make-believe fun by introducing a believable antagonist? I know, let's throw in an encounter with "little green men!"
No, Indy was not ready for aliens.
I'm not even close to being opposed to the idea of the extraterrestrial. In fact, I've been giddily saving my science-fiction and alien-loving side for the opening night of the new X-Files movie this summer.
But the CGI alien was the icing on the sham-flavored cake.
In the beginning of the movie, the Area 51 storyline was very appealing. In fact, the entire idea of aliens probably would have worked a lot better in Indy's world had they not shown the alien at all. Much like an edge-of-your-seat horror movie, the bad guy is always scarier when you can't see him.
The first three movies sampled this edgy, non-visible type of mystery. RAIDERS, TEMPLE and THE LAST CRUSADE all had supernatural elements, but they kept their realistic feel by only suggesting these powers; only giving us a little taste of the larger picture. You didn't see anything much out of the ordinary in RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK until a greedy Bellog and his Nazi comrades insisted on opening the Ark, and even then Indy and Marion didn't witness a thing. TEMPLE OF DOOM consisted of a demonic-like cult, but you never saw the demons behind what glimpses of dark magic we received. And besides eerie traps inside the labyrinth-like tomb of THE LAST CRUSADE, the only paranormal happenings in the film were the miraculous death of nemesis Walter Donavon and revival of Sean Connery's character Henry Jones Sr.
So does it even make sense to ruin the aura created with the original trilogy by showing us a cheesy, full-fledged E.B.E. (Extraterrestrial Biological Entity, for all you non-geeky folk) created digitally in a studio when just the mere implantation of the thought would have sufficed?
The last, but not least, of my Indy-fanatic woes was KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL's dual-hero plot line.
This is Indiana Jones we're talking about. 
More believable than CRYSTAL'S CGI...? |
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The man has enough screen-captivating heroism in one anti-Nazi glare to dedicate essays to. Not only was Shia LaBeouf a poor casting choice and a near insult to the Indiana Jones legacy, but the story of Mutt Williams was too predictable and too happy-Hollywood for me to buy. From the moment this character was introduced I found my hopes for this fourth installment drain faster than my theater beverage.
The presence of the two heroes had been written so disappointingly that neither protagonist had much screen presence at all. Indy has always shared the screen with charming sidekicks in all of his movies of the past but in the end it has always been clear that he is, in fact, the one that saves the day. In KINGDOM, however, it is obvious that the geniuses behind the storyline are either trying to cater to a younger crowd or introduce a Henry Jones the Third spin-off by throwing this implausible and lame character in our faces and into the face of jungle truck aerobatics and vine-swinging monkeys.
Yes, the world still needs Indy.
And we only need one of him.
But what, prey tell, is so fantastic about Dr. Indiana Jones?
Well, predominately, Indiana Jones was real. As a child, I knew that Luke Skywalker and all of his inter-galactic friends were only pretend. I knew that Marty McFly and his time-travelling quests were mere fantasy.
But Indy had lived.
Although his tales took us to the edge of supernatural happenstances and occasionally needed to borrow a bit of imagination, the Nazis in Egypt, the cult in India and the preservationists in Italy really did chase our hero all over the globe. These places and their mysterious tales of power and glory were alive. Indy had actually been to these locations and had actually battled evil there. I could feel it.
Dr. Jones was also not your typical hero. He was not a bullet-proof Superman who was bent on saving the world. He didn't travel continent to continent to foil the plans of the Nazis; no, he was only swept up in their 
That's right, I'm this cool. |
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ploys to gain power. Indiana's thirst for archaeological finds was only surpassed by his belief in justice and in the end he couldn't help but stand up for what was right.
And he also wasn't your "all-American" type hero either, in my opinion. In fact the original films hardly took place on any American soil, with barely any mention of the American government. Indy's motives were, although for the sake of preserving history, somewhat selfish too. The good of the United States didn't really play much of a factor until KINGDOM, where glorious modern Hollywood made Indy into an anti-communist, decorated war hero (albeit suiting for the commie-fearing time period.)
Indiana Jones didn't go looking for trouble, but trouble always found him. He never escaped unscathed, which made him all the more human to me. One of the most powerful and resounding Indy scenes in my mind was him being whipped in THE TEMPLE OF DOOM. It may or may not have been an ironic play on one of Indy's most familiar trademarks, his whip, but it was very much gut-wrenching, gritty and so inhumane that it was definitely of the real-life, human variety.
So for all you folks out there who have been having troubles realizing what really felt off about the most recent installment of the Indiana Jones franchise, I hope that I've helped shed some light on your own thoughts.
Whether INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL is ultimately deemed a good movie or a bad one, the man with the whip and fantastic fedora captured our hearts so very long ago, and shall forever have them in his grasp. Even now, as I continue to see the trailer of this newest movie on television I get chills seeing the all-too-familiar shadow of my favorite hero pasted against an army truck.
Indiana Jones has inspired me to want to become better than what my mere human self should be, and I truly believe that he shall continue to inspire many more generations to come.
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| Amanda Knoss |
If there's something Amanda can't commit to, it's a single taste in films. She believes that Walmart, Starbucks and a certain super-power government are going to clan together to take over the world. Either that, or she's over-caffeinated again.
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