My dorky senses are tingling, yeah we call those loins, and I use mine. |
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There are lots of things that people like to bitch about when it comes to movies, but one things that makes me laugh the most so when people get so bent out of shape about casting choices. This offence to some is especially bad when it comes to characters are adapted from comic books and are very dear to the hearts of geeks everywhere. A word to these geeks: If you are still living alone or in your parents basement, are jealous of the action your dog gets with a bunched up blanket on the floor, and masturbate so often your hands are friction burned, perhaps you have bigger things to worry about in the grand scheme of things than whose going to play the Joker in the sequel to Batman begins.
Get a life! Believe it or not there is world outside of basement window you can barely see through as you watch feet go by, while taking a thirty second thinking break from your eleventh straight hour of Playstation.
Wow, I kind of went off on a rant there, what can I do, Dennis Miller is my hero, ranting genius that he is. Grab his rants books, funniest stuff you could ever hope to read.
Anyway, back to the topic at hand. Let's look at some of the biggest moaners and groaners of the last little while shall we..............
TOBEY MAGUIRE as SPIDERMAN
Holy crap, I can't even count the number of people complained to me about the geek Tobey Maguire getting this role. If you cast the irony aside of geeks complaining that a geek was cast in this role, you'd actually be able to see that the casting decision was not all that bad. Oh, and actually I can count it was 69 times, 69 must have some special resonance in my mind, I'm not sure why, I guess it's a mystery.
Okay so you've got peter Parker a mild mannered reporter...................wait, that's Superman, he's next. Okay, so Peter Parker is a mild mannered 
If writers could write as well as I acted we might have had a good movie |
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photographer, young, not totally popular, a little awkward, someone that no one suspects to be Spiderman. Well, hey, no one expected Tobey to be a good choice for Spiderman, sounds like brilliant casting if you ask me.
People complained about this movie for months and months, and then all the dorks flocked to the theater to confirm their suspicions that he would indeed suck, and of course they had to eat a nice piece of humble pie. It sucks that they'd rather have pink hair pie and are forced to eat humble, but either way they wouldn't know what to do with it anyway, which is why most of these dorks will never admit that they were wrong.
CHRISTOPHER REEVE and BRANDON ROUTH as SUPERMAN
I could have also included Dean Cain in that line, but as Lois and Clark was televised, not theatrical, most people weren't expecting too much from it anyway. That being said many people were quite up in arms about the unknown Reeve being cast as the "Man of Steel" I was only a year old mind you, so I'm going on hearsay, but it doesn't take much of a stretch of the imagination to figure out that many people would be upset about a major character like Kal-el being played by a relative unknown who biggest roll at that time might as well been "a cop" on an episode of Starsky and Hutch. At that time he was about as big as one of the extras who play a dead body on an episode of Law and Order. He was so obscure his mom needed a head shot to remember his name.............. Okay I'm done.
How do you cast the role of a god by a man no ones ever even heard of? I can't remember, oh wait yes I can, did Reeve pull it off? Um, yeah, yeah he did.
Flash forward a couple decades to 2004 when they announced the casting of Brandon Routh in the new Superman film. The people would have been much better served complaining about the script 
Look at he face, hard, rough, edgy, Perfect Bond |
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than over the casting choice of Routh. Nonetheless the old argument was renewed, and cries of Brandon WHO? rang out across that land.
Forget the fact that it was fitting that a movie supposed to exist within the canon of the original two films, it is fitting that an unknown take over the helm when the original actor was the same. It was a fitting homage to an otherwise great actor who ironically proved not to be a man of steel in body, but one in mind, like Christopher Reeve. Routh played the bumbling Clark Kent to perfection, for what little we saw of him, and played Superman, as convincingly as he possibly could, given the big red boots he had to fill of Reeve.
P.S - You'll notice that I say "Reeve" correctly, unlike a majority of hopeless morons who talk about how great Christopher Reeves is while adding an "S" to his name which doesn't exist.
DANIEL CRAIG as JAMES BOND
This one is so recent, I don't even think I need to comment on it that much. I will be brief.
Dorks whined.
Dorks whined.
The film was released.
Craig kicked some serious ass.
Casino Royal was the best Bond ever.
Pierce Brosnan can kiss my ass.
Yeah, I think that about sums that one up pretty well.
Bottom line is there are always questionable casting choices. Some are fixed before they ever reach production, or at least a release (as was the case with the casting of Eric Stoltz and John Lithgow in BACK TO THE FUTURE), and some are not fixed (like Britney Spears in CROSSROADS). Let's try having a little faith in the people that do this for a living and just maybe let's actually accept that MOST of them know what they are doing.
Except for the guy that originally cast Sly Stallone as Beverly Hills Cop, I'm sorry but that hopeless bastard needs to be shot, not just fired.
Of course that's just my opinion I could be wrong
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| Mouthing Off |
Every other Thursday
Mouthing Off is the no bull, tell it like it is column on various issues in the Hollywood arena. You want PC, then keep on moving, you won't get it here.
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| Jeff Winston |
I am a part time writer and full time teacher. I am currently stationed in the middle of nowhere, northern Alberta, Canada. I love movies, and I love to vent, I am happy to have an outlet to incorporate both here on Matchflick.
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| Contact |
If you have a comment, question, or suggestion, you can send a message to Jeff Winston by clicking here.
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