Currently, we're in a very, very dry spell with movies, so I must admit, I'm a bit out of tune in terms of what's in theaters these days (I know the big ones, but haven't made an effort to check the paper in hopes of seeing a title that might catch my eye). They're not necessarily movies that inspire much hatred from my inner cockles, but instead films that I feel don't even warrant discussion over a case of beer on a Friday night with friends. That should tell you a lot, as last weekend I recall debating for roughly twenty-four minutes whether or not a tomato should be considered a handheld food, in the same vein as an apple or pear.
I loved/hated A.I. Sorry, hated/loved.
Obviously, I prefer movies that don't suck, over ones that do. This is not a statement limited to seasoned, cynical, critics, it's one that applies to anyone that has ever let any sort of ineffectual motion picture note enter their unassuming pupils So yeah, I'm not saying anything that should spark any discussion or especially repeated readings to try and figure out if I'm saying something deep (I'm truly not).
In an effort to provide something useful before the end of this all-important third paragraph, I will draw a distinction here that will separate the casual fan from the film critic. Casual fans see movies that suck, and
they're done with it, and who can blame them? Certainly not me, nor should anyone who's ever returned a basic household appliance to Wal-Mart for not performing its function properly. Out of sight, out of mind, I forget therefore I Am. For us though, it's different. We're ok with a movie blowing all kinds of ass it gives us something to talk about, goddamnit.
Where brutal movies thrive.
See, sometimes, it's not enough to just hate the movie. If you see a piece of shit that nobody else dug either, then there's nothing to talk about, and the movie can't even exist as a discussion piece, a spectrum that is nearly akin to the actual experience of seeing a truly triumphant picture. My cockamamie theory is that the real appeal of movies isn't the literal experience of going to the theater, sitting down, and viewing.
No, I truly believe that the aftershock of a movie, which includes the subsequent feeling immediately following the movie, discussion afterwards, and eventual impact on your overall life are the REAL reasons people go see anything. If you think about it, how many movies actually are totally and utterly mindblowing WHILE watching it? They're out there, but it's the exception, and not the rule, so we can effectively group the movie experience in with playing overly long/tedious video
games and lame standup comedians in whatever lame watering hole is in your neighborhood. Neither are particularly satisfying activities, yet bitching and debating about them afterwards provides some truly pleasurable ways to kill time.
It can be half full if the movie is totally empty.
If you call me a cynic for that, you're just missing not only the forest for the trees, but any sort of woodland existing in this world, for the fact is, I'm seeing something positive in all these trash movies camouflaged as a decent way to kill a Friday night. They're not. They're a poor way to kill an evening, but a great way to kill any boring downtime afterwards.
So by that measure, some of my favorite movies have been movies I've hated that have been ceremoniously loved by the general consensus. Not because it makes me stand out or different or any shit like that, but because that movie gave me a legitimate and totally valid method of a)Creating conflict with anybody I so choose, just by my outspoken hatred of the show and b)Something to contemplate in my spare time, the mere fact that there's so many insanely dumb people out there to make such a thing popular, the magnitude of such a movement.
Overall, shitty movies have a bad rep. See the big picture, and remember, an absolutely horrible movie is better then an average one.
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Raging Against the Machine: Film musings from a Canadian who can do a Rubik's cube much faster then you can.
Jeff is a columnist who lives in Saskatchewan, and if you can't pronounce that properly, he'd prefer you not read anything he writes.|
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