Television IS bad for you. |
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After going to the movies to see SILENT HILL this past weekend, I was struck with inspiration on my next column's focus. I was trying to think of something interesting to write about (as one does), when it hit me. I'll write about terrible endings, brilliant! No. What you'll be reading today is horror's use of children. Though they may be small and pestering, they do have a lot of unique traits that the genre can make use of, in the most perverted way of course.
What are children anyhow, little, parasitic, filthy gnats? Well sure, in reality. In movie-land however, they represent innocence, carefree outlooks, and naiveté. They're like clay; you can shape them to however you want their character to be. The movie POLTERGEIST has the main character of a little girl, who by mere curiosity gets caught in ghost limbo, and later covered in ghost snot. She played the role perfectly, screaming with fear most of time. While her parents tried to make sense of what was going on, she was just freaking out, as a child would. Children won't try to logically understand why there's a monster in their room, they'll either be scared to death or try to have a tea party with it.
Children can also be used to give a film a little more weirdness. I call this the "creepy kid element". M. Night Shyamalan (THE SIXTH SENSE) is notorious for this. Out of the four "Hollywood" movies he has made, three have used the "creepy kid element". The most prominent one was Haley Joel Osment in THE SIXTH SENSE. Instead of being innocent and carefree, the child is usually highly intelligent, afraid of something, and always talking about 
If Gregory Peck can't beat 'em, run the hell outta there. |
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something odd. This makes us uneasy because children aren't supposed to act like that; we can take adults being creepy, but kids? THE RING also used this component. Kids likes this are also very likely to get into very messed up situations, a la THE SHINING. Also, if you put a kid in a suit, makes him that much more weird.
But what's worse than kids being creepy? That's right, kids being possessed/the spawn of Satan. Have you ever tried to clean up brimstone and sulfur? Windex just doesn't cut it. Children who are "evil" pose a problem. Unlike adult minions of the devil, kids take much more fortitude to kill. It's inherent in our nature to protect children, not to blow them away (right?). So we try our damndest to "save" them before killing the little demonic brats. THE OMEN and THE EXORCIST both show this usually futile act of good will. There's also something disgustingly wrong with children being tools of evil, other than the obvious reasons. In general, possession is a lot like rape, and then you make the victim a child. I hope I didn't just ruin horror movies for you people.
Children are almost holy creatures in horror, the untainted prize to evil. When they are harmed, it's beyond a travesty. When an adult is killed, five points! Children are to us, what explosions are to Michael Bay; the most important thing ever. They are very useful in film; they can change the entire of a person's personality or drive a person to suicide. So remember, if a kid has 666 branded in his head, is spewing split pea soup and starts drawing pictures of his "dark, fire friends", shoot the little booger eater.
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| The Lair of the Mad |
Every other Tuesday
'The Lair' discusses the many aspects and qualities of the horror genre. From actors, to make-up, to music, James Shafie explores everything the "cult" genre spews up.
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| James Shafie |
James Shafie is an avid watcher of movies of all sorts, but the horror genre is closest to his heart. He loves to read and is addicted to music, mostly metal and it’s thousands of sub-genres. He was once fired by Blockbuster, which we see as a strong character trait.
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